and the first place goes to.. not you
I’m suppose to study for my stat101 exam now.. but alas! I’m typing an entry, yet again, like a motherfucker… Shitty. The praning side of my mind appears to be in frenzy lately.
Anyhooo…
Somehow, I’ve pondered on the word ‘almost’.. meaning ‘nearly’, ‘not quite’, ‘just about’ etc. and it just sank in to me, harshly and deeply, that this simple yet heart piercing word seems to be one of the gravest that I’ve gone through. And recently, is hiking up my list of top most dreaded nightmares. Yey.
‘Almost’, as far as I know, have tortured a lot of people… And unfortunately, I am one of its frequent victims. For me, it really fucking sucks! Being almost there.. is not there at all.. (ehh?) its like being second best.. if ever there is such a term… shit.. second best?! What the fuck.. I hate that feeling.. that feeling of being already there.. but not quite there. Wherever there is. 0_0 waah. this is just so confusing.
But honestly, the bittersweet twinge it does to your heart is quite gratifying. It makes you feel pain.. even anguish.. even hate.. and it never fails to make you realize that you are imperfect… that you have flaws.. It never fails to make us remember that we are just human. and we can't do anything about it. Our strengths define each of us.. but as well as our flaws.. our mistakes.. our shortcomings.
Having been able to feel these deranged emotions seems to be a way for Jesus to talk to me. And I like it when he talks to me.. really.
Yes, my friend, you’ll be dismayed if you landed on the word ‘almost’. It scares the hell out of me, and probably, you’d feel the same way too. I’d rather be on the top most or down down down below.. but never float in between. But I guess it’s how life works. And I have to get used to it. (or if ever I don’t, I’ll just push thru with my plans involving a glass of vodka and a gun)
Sometimes, you just can’t get what you want. You’ll get close to the dream.. but not get the dream itself.
Raaarrr… shut up you spoiled bitch!
yes.. I think I’m back to my old self :)
Anyhooo…
Somehow, I’ve pondered on the word ‘almost’.. meaning ‘nearly’, ‘not quite’, ‘just about’ etc. and it just sank in to me, harshly and deeply, that this simple yet heart piercing word seems to be one of the gravest that I’ve gone through. And recently, is hiking up my list of top most dreaded nightmares. Yey.
‘Almost’, as far as I know, have tortured a lot of people… And unfortunately, I am one of its frequent victims. For me, it really fucking sucks! Being almost there.. is not there at all.. (ehh?) its like being second best.. if ever there is such a term… shit.. second best?! What the fuck.. I hate that feeling.. that feeling of being already there.. but not quite there. Wherever there is. 0_0 waah. this is just so confusing.
But honestly, the bittersweet twinge it does to your heart is quite gratifying. It makes you feel pain.. even anguish.. even hate.. and it never fails to make you realize that you are imperfect… that you have flaws.. It never fails to make us remember that we are just human. and we can't do anything about it. Our strengths define each of us.. but as well as our flaws.. our mistakes.. our shortcomings.
Having been able to feel these deranged emotions seems to be a way for Jesus to talk to me. And I like it when he talks to me.. really.
Yes, my friend, you’ll be dismayed if you landed on the word ‘almost’. It scares the hell out of me, and probably, you’d feel the same way too. I’d rather be on the top most or down down down below.. but never float in between. But I guess it’s how life works. And I have to get used to it. (or if ever I don’t, I’ll just push thru with my plans involving a glass of vodka and a gun)
Sometimes, you just can’t get what you want. You’ll get close to the dream.. but not get the dream itself.
Raaarrr… shut up you spoiled bitch!
yes.. I think I’m back to my old self :)
posted by prinsesapraning at 2:24 AM
*APPLAUSE*
That was very heart felt, my dear! :D